I can’t help it! I get so excited when working on something new that I just have to throw it at somebody. Usually, it’s my critique group that happens bi-monthly. I love my group dearly (I have a freaking tattoo dedicated to that little writers collective). However, I think I share my projects too early with them.
I share during the exploratory or discovery phase. This phase should be completely personal and just for me. I just can’t help it when I work on something new I want somebody else to read it, validate it, and help me through it. But that’s not what I NEED. What I need to do is spend personal time with the project.
I don’t give myself enough time to create my vision of the project without the insight or opinions of others. Especially when I share it with people whose opinions I value so highly. What happens when I share projects early is that I start to have the voices and critiques in my mind when I go back to drafting. It puts me into an editing and development mindset when I need to still be in the creative “anything is possible” stage.
My newest project is getting me through a very stressful time in my life. I claim that writing this discovery draft is my “coping mechanism” to avoid the swirling thoughts in my mind. Is it a bit crazy that I already have 22k words in a fresh project when also planning a wedding, budgeting and planning for 2025 at work, and working on bettering myself as a human in general? Yes…and yet I can’t stop.
I am a master of putting too much on my plate. I’ll look into that in therapy, but right now I can guess that it keeps me from having to think too hard about if certain choices are right for me. Namely, is my life going in the direction I want it to? Yes…yes it is, but also in some ways no…(my childhood self thought I would be a self-employed creative by now—author, artist, SOMETHING.)
So, I’m trying to remind myself that I’m allowed to create just for the sake of creating. I’m allowed to keep projects close to my chest. I’m allowed to work on things for a little bit and scrap them if they are just there to keep my mind occupied and end up going nowhere.
Art is allowed to be messy, nonsensical, and personal. Writing is my art. I need to start letting myself play around with my canvas and just…create. Stop sharing things before they’re ready to be shared!
Happy Creating!
Rachel
Subtle Stories 