I’ve finished the first chapter of my rewrite! Let’s celebrate that for a quick second, always stop to celebrate right? I’m also ALMOST to the 5,000 word mark and well into the second chapter. (let’s be honest I’m only just past 4,000 but still)
My rewrite of this novel has some major shifting of scene order as well as redesigning some characters. It’s actually been kind of terrifying to sit down with the finished work and say “okay, let’s make this better.” Why? Because…what it if gets worse? Yeah, there are some scenes that I KNOW can get better and desperately need to be rewritten completely. But, there are other scenes that are just “meh” that I’m very nervous about writing.
This has stopped me for a good 5-10 minutes of time before my sessions start. I give myself a pep talk, read over and do some light editing of whatever paragraphs come before what I need to be working on, and then I try my best to keep writing off of what I’ve just read. This usually gets me to shake off my fear.
I think the biggest issue is that I’ve had so many other experiences of rewriting that was simply just copying what I’ve already written. I don’t want this draft to be finished like that. I want this draft to be better and cleaner. It needs so much work that, to get it to a better place, I can’t simply copy/paste chunks of content.
I am re-typing every single word of my manuscript. For the most part, I am changing every single word of my manuscript. If nothing else, the placement of the words is shifting. It is both thrilling and absolutely terrifying. Most importantly, I must remember that I am making my manuscript better, step by step.
Have you started a re-write and felt this type of fear? How have you dealt with it?